Free Conflict Coaching; for getting to the heart of the matter

I am just noticing how many people tell me they dread the holidays because of conflicts with family members or friends; some conflicts are new and surprising, some are repeated every year. Has this happened for you? Is there something left over from the Xmas break that still sits uncomfortably with you? You may have experienced broken promises, and disappointments or there may have been some challenging behaviours or tactlessness leading to hurt feelings, anger and disconnection.

Or maybe you are noticing some trepidation about returning to work because of an ongoing issue from last year that is not yet resolved or an issue that still needs to be discussed (even though you’d rather not).

Perhaps you are saying to yourself:

· I will never allow myself to get triggered like that again – I will ignore the person or I won’t invite them to the next gathering or I will just keep my distance – being friendly but cool.

· Next time that happens I won’t swallow my response for the sake of harmony – and you can already hear the conversation that you plan will happen going around in your head

· Never mind, it doesn’t really matter – I prefer to keep the peace – all the while feeling the cost to yourself in your body – in tightened shoulders or heaviness in the pit of the stomach or headaches or just a sense of tired resignation.

Or you decide something has to change – you have to get your head around this and work out new, effective ways for dealing with conflict – old ones that resurface and new ones that may come your way. Whatever you decide you want it to be different somehow:

· You may decide to  have this  difficult conversation about a matter that’s important to you. It may be a conversation you’ve been avoiding for quite a while. Or it may be one you’ve had many times and it’s come out poorly. Or it may be one that has come out of left field and you suddenly found yourself in a difficult conversation you hadn’t anticipated. But this time you want to handle it with dignity and mutual respect.

· You want to find ways to move beyond being triggered or withdrawing. You want to be able to hear the needs or values behind the words and stay connected and communicate honestly and openly.

· Or you may just want more understanding about what is going on. You want some insight into the dynamics of this conflict or tension between you.

Conflict Coaching can help you find your way through all the ins and outs of the issue and the relationship. You will also acquire new skills to manage current conflicts and avoid future conflicts.

 Remember, it’s not that you have conflict, it’s how you deal with it. Handled well, these differences can signal creativity, better decisions and stronger relationships.

 But conflict avoided or conflict done poorly just creates a dynamic that drains you of energy one way or another.

How Conflict Coaching Works

You work on a one-to-one basis with me. The first step is coming to an understanding of the current situation and its impact both from your perspective and from theirs.  After that, we work together to explore your options for resolving the conflict and managing the relationship.  You also get to try out and practice new skills.

I can support you in:

· Exploring a current conflict or a conflict from the past that still troubles you

· Preparing for a challenging conversation

· Coming to a deeper understanding of your own needs and values and how you want to express these in your life.

· Just being fully heard.

Sessions can take place once or on an ongoing basis, depending upon your needs. Most conflicts can be fully explored inside 4 hours and a typical coaching process will involve one 90 minute session and then 3 shorter sessions. That said I have coached some people from start to finish inside an hour or two and they have gained enough insight to move forward on their own.

What Conflict coaching is not

Let me just say that Conflict Coaching is different from therapy. Therapy can be a lengthy process of several sessions during which people talk about their past. With therapy, the focus is often on changing one or both of the parties. Although this can be effective for some people, others just want to focus on resolving the difficult situation, which is why they prefer conflict coaching.  Conflict coaching is also different from mediation. Mediation has both parties come together with the mediator helping them to hear and be heard around a seemingly intractable dispute.

  From today until February 28th I am offering Conflict Coaching with your first hour of coaching free . You get the coaching and can the only thing I request from you is a short testimonial for my website. Then you can decide if you would like more coaching.

You can make a direct booking with me for your ONE HOUR session using my 24 hour appointment scheduler. Click here:  https://my.timedriver.com/BWM1N

Our conversation is private, non-judgmental and without pressure; then if you decide you would enjoy some coaching we can work out times that work for both of us.

Warmly

Leona

Ps: If you know someone who may benefit or be interested in my offer please feel free to forward this post.